Tales of the Modern Day Mom

Alright, let's go back for a second to the 1950's- calm down it's only for a second! Let's go back to a time when the role of a woman was that of a homemaker. A cooking, cleaning smiling, baking, overly optimistic, perfectly put-together Mother & Homemaker. Cue a grinning woman vacuuming with an apron tied around her waist. Maybe even a little wink and a wave!

This housewife presented the perfect image. An image of an immaculate house, perfectly groomed kid(s), impeccable taste in clothes and decor, and enough energy left at the end of the day to dote on her husband. Depicted through TV and print- she was pathologically obsessed with cleanliness and figuring out the newest kitchen 'gadgets'. She was the epitome of happiness and perfection... or was she?!

Alright- we now know that she wasn't! This was just an image being portrayed to us. Mostly for consumerism (and the reminder of gender roles), but we as women also had a desire for something more! More opportunities outside of the home- and I'd say we worked pretty hard to get them! We've pursued higher education, learned to say 'no' and actually mean it, demanded political participation, and rallied together and pushed our way right through the front door of the work force. We've landed jobs that were once only offered to men! AND THANKFULLY TOO- because in our current decade, a two-parent income needed to survive is more common than not! Bottom line- We've come so far!

Go us!

Some of us are CEO's, supervisors, teachers, nurses, Dr.'s directors, therapists, hair-stylists, philanthropists, nanny's, police officers (Yes- I'm throwing out the careers of many of my friends right now) the list goes on! Some of us are even working multiple jobs to work around our kids' schedules so we can be the most present in their lives. And some of us are single parents working to support ourselves and our kids (if this is you- YOU ARE MY HERO!) But most of us are forgetting to give ourselves more grace and self-care.

One reason for this (I believe)- is that the same image of perfection is creeping up on us yet again- and we're not even realizing it. Cue Tik Tok, Instagram, Facebook and other social media outlets. We're being inundated with perfect homes, beautiful home cooked meals, perfect family photos (how is everyone looking at the camera and smiling at the exact same time- the only way my kiddo does that is if someone yells out "poop" loudly on the other end of the camera or she's bribed with a treat), and I swear people's dogs are even smiling too!

And let me just ask what we're all thinking...How does every influencer on Instagram have perfectly shaped, high-thick eyebrows, smooth skin and perfectly plump lips?! Is this a filter I don't know about, or do we really all have the time, resources and desire to get injected?! Side note- I can't wait for the time when au natural makes its comeback. I'll be a real beaut again!

Anyways, after a quick little scroll through the digital world, I think we're being left with the illusion that we need to be doing more than we already are. We're putting too much pressure on ourselves. We're convinced we're not "good enough", but you know what?! WE ARE! We also need to keep in mind two things:

1- We're juggling more than before

2- Nothing and no one are perfect. Just like in the 50's - it's all an illusion!

I always LOVE that refreshing Mom that turns the camera around every once and while on her messy home. Or the post that reads, "Instagram vs. Reality". Or the mom friend who sends a funny Tik Tok at 9pm with the hashtag #MomLife. You know, the one where the mom is trying to make an important phone call, and her kid is screaming and banging on a pot like a drum in the background (so she can't even hear herself think).

We need to lighten up on ourselves. Just this week- I was exhausted from an already long day, and I knew I had to teach an evening yoga class- so I picked up a rotisserie chicken and pre-made potato salad (threw it in the fridge) and said, "Dinner Done"! I then found myself driving to class and feeling guilty that I didn't actually cook something. Why?! Why do we do that to ourselves?!

BOTTOM LINE- we all need to give ourselves and our "Mom Friends" a little more encouragement and grace. We need to text them every once and while and let them know they're doing amazing. We all need to practice a little more self-care at the end of the day (even if it means eating chocolate in your car in silence in the back of a parking lot. YES- I've done that), or going for a walk, or reading a book. Or even just turning off our phones completely and watching a funny comedy on Netflix. I mean we could all use a little more humor and to take one unnecessary thing off our calendar!

SO- If you're reading this, and you're a Mom- here's your daily reminder-

"YOU ARE ENOUGH AND YOU'RE DOING AMAZING!"